4.23.2010
What is wrong with people now a days?! Or am i the only one SICK and CRAZY here? Why is there NO ONE who is willing to UNDERSTAND others' feelings before doing/saying/joking about anything. Or am i SUCH a NICE fxcking idiot to care so much?!
You have fun. You play around. You go out with different groups of people. You mix around with different groups of friends. You have different issues and problems to settle and face. But did u ever ever realised, My biggest problem is YOU?! How can you possibly throw everything we had before one side and proceed with your own stuffs without thinking I might be touturing myself HERE! RIGHT HERE!
I admit I DID want to leave. I forced myself to. But I know it (at that point of time) I can't ! And when i finally see some HOPE when you're finally out, I FELT YOU EVEN FURTHER! WHAT IS HAPPENING !!
I'm super jealous thinking that you might be going out to meet those who're interested in you. Knowing that YOU HAD FUN with them. and one of them got you the ELMO you find SO CUTE. It only tells me, There is NO NEED and NO MORE ROOM for my TASMANIAN DEVIL!!
Stupidly wanted to get it. Change its clothes since you liked hoodies so much. Buy a pendant with the meaning of "Hope you find your true love" OR "You are my devilish true love". put it on and SURPRISE! With a stupid card on top to let you know the meaning of the pendant. and a simple "I hope everything gets in place. And in case you needed someone to be around but don't know who to turn to, TASMANIA will be here. Just like I'll be a phone call away.."
So much things, easier said then done RIGHT! Being penniless is a PAIN IN MY ARSE NOW.knowing the fact that MY KUKU idea which came from my heart LOST to someone who has more money? If she meant something to you, WHY DON'T YOU JUST SAY !!
" I have someone in mind now. I'm sorry. You+Me=Friends"
It would be hard for me. But ATLEAST i won't go CRAZYYYYY so long like i am NOW! D:<
"i like you but i need more time." VERY HARD TO SAY OUT?
"i like you as a friend." YOU THINK I WON'T UNDERSTAND?
Or maybe this is what you will send? -"I don't know what i want"
You have your things to do. You think I don't?! I cannot stand it when everything reminds me of you!
oooh! Maybe i should THANK GOD you text me (forwarded MASS MSG) about the acid rain thing this afternoon. I was so happy to see your text 1st thing i opened my eyes.
How long do you want to run? I don't need you to treat me extra nice. But things are so confusing that I don't know what to think! It's like letting you hold a knife and I'm the one who's pulling you into stabbing me, again and again.
On one hand. You did think of getting together with me. On the other, You're treating me coldly like some cats (you didn't like cats).
Even gerger said it was obvious! If i still meant something. Won't you read the diary once you got home? Won't you even give me some response? Won't you even care about what i blogged about and what i did, where i went and stuffs?
WHAT AM I TO YOU?! ok. I'll answer that for you. FRIENDS.
DO I MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?!
SHOW ME! I tried to observe. But disappointing results. Other than the part wher you text me, asking me about my exam. I feel NOTHING! :(
If you're a player, you did a very good job. But let me tell you. No one can be a player forever. I admit i was. But I don't know why YOU. But yes, YOU made me isolate. -.- LOVE will be a game the best player loses in the end.
You're different from other guys. You need to mature up a bit. Not that I'm not giving you time. But now, i feel insercure! It's as though you'll leave. In fact, you're not even around anymore.
Am gonna tattoo your initial. J.
You know who you are. I've told you too much.
If one day, you're not mine. I'm sorry. I didn't know how to handle guys. I'm sorry I wasn't good enough. I'm sorry I didn't have the chance to face it earlier. I'm sorry I confessed so much. I'm sorry I went crazy and did so much things. I'm sorry if i become more and more irritating. I'm sorry. Just sorry.
Sorry for not being brave like other girls. Sorry for making you the one i love.
I'm sorry for everything I've done/said out of anger and fruastrations. If i caused stress, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for unwilling to forget about any little things you do. I'm sorry for not being able to let you go like i said i would. I'm sorry for wanting myself to remember every single thing that includes you. I'm sorry for loving you.
Labels: I'm Sorry
12:35 AM
